Bend over and cough

TSA jokes

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"Yesterday a woman wore a bikini to LAX airport hoping to avoid the pat down. She is still being patted down." 

–Conan O'Brien 

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 "Have you heard the TSA's new slogan?

 'We handle more junk than eBay.'" 

-Jay Leno

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"You know, if I wanted somebody halfheartedly patting my groin without eye contact, I'd get married."

 -Seth Meyers 

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"Hillary Clinton said on CBS that she would not submit to a pat-down, to which Bill Clinton said, 'Tell me about it.'" 

–Jay Leno