FOUR!

 First shall we bow our head as I tell you a religious joke?

 Jesus and Moses are playing golf. On the 5th hole, a shot over water to an island green, Moses hits his 6-iron and it lands perfectly on the green. Jesus takes out his 7-iron and begins tee-ing it up.
Moses says: ``The 7 isn't enough club. It'll go in the water''
Jesus replies: ``If Arnie Palmer can do it, I can do it.''
He swings the 7 and sure enough, right in the drink. He tees up a second ball and grabs his 7-iron again. Once again Moses reminds him of his previous attempt and Jesus says, ``If Arnie Palmer can do it, I can do it.'' ``PLOP'' in the water it goes again. He continues this until he has hit all his golf balls into the water. At this point, he begins walking out on the water looking down to locate his lost golf balls. The foursome behind them approaches the tee, spots Jesus out on the lake nd says to Moses,
``Hey, who does that guy think he is, Jesus Christ?''

Moses replies,
``No, Arnie Palmer.''

A man was addressing the ball when an announcement came over the loud-speaker: "Will the gentleman on hole number one please not hit from the Ladies' tee box."

The man backs away, a little distracted, then approaches his ball again. As he does, the same announcement comes over the loud-speaker: "Will the gentleman on hole number one please not hit from the Ladies' tee box."
The man is getting irritated now, and after backing away from his shot - approaches his ball one more time. This time the announcement came: "We really need the gentleman on hole number one to move off of the Ladies' tee box!"
To which the man turns around and yells: "And I really need the announcer to shut up and let me play my second shot!"