The work week.

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I used to have what was called a work week.  Always looked forward to dress down Friday.  I once told some co-office workers that one day every day would be dress down day IE..business casual and they of course thought I was crazy.  This was back around 1996 give or take a few years.  By 2001 we were indeed business casual every day.  

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                       Dress-down day memos

Most people accept that Friday is a dress-down day, but sometimes being casual doesn’t quite go according to plan!
Office memo no 1
Effective immediately, the company is adopting Fridays as dress-down day so that employees may express their diversity.
Office memo no 2
Spandex and leather micro-miniskirts are not appropriate attire for dress-down day. Neither are string ties, rodeo belt buckles or moccasins.
Office memo no 3
Casual refers to dress only, not attitude. When planning Friday's wardrobe, remember image is a key to our success.?
Office memo no 4
A seminar on how to dress for dress-down day will be held at 4 p.m. Friday in the cafeteria. Fashion show to follow. Attendance is mandatory.
Office memo no 5
As an outgrowth of Friday's seminar, a 14-member Dress-down Day Task Force has been appointed to prepare guidelines for proper dress.
Office memo no 6
The Dress-down Day Task Force has completed a 30-page manual. A copy of Relaxing Dress Without Relaxing Company Standards has been mailed to each employee. Please review the chapter You Are What You Wear and consult the ‘home casual’ versus ‘business casual’ checklist before leaving for work each Friday. If you have doubts about the appropriateness of an item of clothing, contact your D-dDTF representative before 7 a.m. on Friday.
Office memo no 7
Because of lack of participation, dress-down day has been discontinued, effective immediately.

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At this point in history the above may seem like a joke but in reality allowing office employees to come to work in blue jeans and a golf shirt (no tie) made most old guard management feel threatened and I am sure they actually saw them selves as the only adults in the corporate world.  I was once sent home because I actually came to work wearing a sweater over a shirt with no tie...I was sent home to get a tie. 

 One could not function in a cubical with out a tie.......don't you know.

Times have changed and I wonder once in awhile if it is for the better.  For some people to be given the freedom to choose what to wear to work is akin to telling them they can also wallow in mud all day.  

HAPPY NATIONAL POLAR BEAR DAY

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Why do humans go swimming in ice covered water in February?  

CENSORED.

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Have I mentioned how much I am missing Jay Leno?  I stole most of my gags from Jay and now I have to steal from the late night comic hacks who seem to think they are funny. Oh well at least it is free.

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"Toronto Mayor Rob Ford is making the rounds again. Today he did an interview with Matt Lauer on the 'Today' show. Lauer said, 'Thanks for getting up early to be with us.' Then Ford said, 'I never went to bed.'" –Jimmy Fallon 

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 "The FDA has approved a new camera that can be swallowed so that doctors can look at the inside of their patients' bodies. So to answer your question: Yes, selfies CAN get worse." 

–Jimmy Fallon

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 "The Olympics are finished. Everybody has gone home, so once again there are no gay people in Sochi." –David Letterman

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 "Hey, you know who they locked up? Public enemy No. 1, El Chapo Guzman. He was the leading distributor of cocaine and cocaine-related items in the world. So another setback for Toronto Mayor Rob Ford." –David Letterman

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" girl scout in San Francisco sold 117 boxes of cookies in two hours after setting up shop outside a medical marijuana dispensary. And the very next day she became the youngest person ever to receive a MacArthur Genius Grant." –Seth Meyers

You can not do that in public!

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"After 16 days of competition, the closing ceremony for the Winter Olympics is this Sunday. 

Vladimir Putin was like, 

'It has been fun time, 

 and I'm sad to see everyone escape . . . 

I mean, get away . . .

 I mean, go home.'"

–Jimmy Fallon 

"This weekend is George Washington's birthday. 

Washington had probably the hardest job of any other president because he had no predecessor to blame things on.

 He was out there all on his own."

 –David Letterman

Happy Monday!

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 The movie Office Space, is one of those guy movies that really stand out in the Guy Movie Hall of Fame.  It has all the type of people you run into in a normal American corporate office or what we used to call Cube Ville.  For some odd reason I love the term "A Case of the Mondays." 

 But since I am retired all my days are like a Saturday.  
 I guess one could say everyday I have a ........

CASE OF THE SATURDAYS. MUHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Framed I have been.

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Can one use good English and still create a funny gag or pun?

 

Buzz Kill

Introducing a new new comic strip concept I am calling "Buzz Kill".  My wife came up with that name and it kinda sorta fits the concept. 
So often, you post something on Facebook or other CyberSpace soap box and someone will take a snarking swipe at what you just wrote.  "You used "YOUR" when you should have used "YOU'RE". 

The PC and Grammar Cop shown here.. I am calling "J. Edgar" after J. Edgar Hoover former FBI big Cheese and rumored cross dresser on the week end. 

Let's have some fun poking all those Snarking drive-by "Let's take what you are saying out of context and make you look like an idiot", in their collective eyes.
The term "Buzz Kill" is old American slang meaning about the same thing as "Kill Joy".  Back in the old days when we were all much younger and liking to party too much, there was always someone who felt it their duty to remind us to act our age and quit dancing on the bar, stop tossing the midget, stop farting in public, and remember you have to go to work in the morning so let's stop this child's play.  I am sure you have known someone like that as I have as well, usually it was our dear old mother.

Figure Skating

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"The Olympics are winding down in Sochi, and the Russian Olympic Committee says one of the giant Olympic rings that malfunctioned during the opening ceremony will be working for the closing ceremony. So it looks like Russia will be ready for the start of the Winter Olympics by the END of the Winter Olympics." 

–Jimmy Fallon

"Two former members of the Russian punk band Pussy Riot were detained by police in Sochi. If found guilty, they could be sentenced to two weeks in a Sochi hotel room." 
                                            –Conan O'Brien
           "What's the point to two men for a luge event? 
        Why not three or four? Why not stack them up?
                         Imagine 15 guys piled up."                                 
                                        –Jimmy Kimmel

BOB

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This is sort of a tribute to Bob Newhart, 

one the all time great American Comics.  

He had two television shows:  

The Bob Newhart Show and Newhart. 

 He once said that if he ever did make another television show he would simply call it Bob.

In the final scene of the finale of NEWHART, Bob has a heart attack and wakes up in bed with Joanna, the wife from his first television show.  

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZgdUWXf8jJk

 

Medic up!

 Today for fun I am trying something a little difficult technically.  I see stuff like this sometimes in graphic novels and is pretty time consuming but what else do I have?
One of the best parts of not working for anyone else like a syndication or an actual professional publication is that I can do stuff like this as well as changing the lay out format on a daily basis.  
Here I am at the ripe old age of 67 and still trying new stuff..
As they say bear with me, if you have been following this blog you have been witness to some transformation in my cartoon style and gag writing.  Hopefully I am improving as I go along and I can only imagine what stuff by Walt Disney and other cartoon icons were like in the beginning.
The name I gave to the French Poodle Le Beau was the name of a French character in the TV show Hogan's Heroes.
One last thing, the reason I use the term Liberation Front is because that is what Marxist rebels in third world nations called them selves (People Liberation Front of Viet Nam)

                              * SDSLF= SRAY DOGS OF SOCHI LIBERATION FRONT.

"they may take our lives but they will never take our freedom!"

 The speech is the one that William Wallace gave in the movie BRAVEHEART, with a few modifications.

Caption

 Russian Cops.....

They look more like mug shots.

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The Russian cops who are shooting the stray dogs of Sochi, Russia......................maybe should have mug shots.  

 

 Below are some of the Sochi Stray dogs

 that Russian Cops are killing.

Keeping you safe at Sochi

"Обеспечение безопасности и надёжности на Зимних Олимпийских Играх." 
This is what it should have said on the poster...Sorry but I got my translation from Google Translate...I should know better. 
 The SOCHI STRAY DOG LIBERATION FRONT

 are starting to fight back. 

Tomorrow, Boris the Russian Bear who is now 

Alpha male leader of the Sochi Stray Dogs Liberation Front will make his very dramatic effort to rally the troops in good Hollywood style.

 Twins Separated at birth?

Hey Comrad Bear!

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Boris the Russian bear has been chase and shot at all over the Winter Olympic site at Sochi, Russia.  

The Russian Cops are also shooting and killing stray dogs.  The Dogs have had enough and are about to fight back.  They only lack one thing, A Leader..Looks like Boris is about to become the leader of the Rebel stray dogs.  Soon we shall be seeing the red flag with the yellow paw print in the corner.

STRAY DOGS OF SOCHI....UNITE AND FIGHT BACK! 

Ледовая арена для керлинга

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Poor old Boris, the Russian bear who has been wandering around the Winter Olympics

 just trying to figure what is going on and trying to stay alive and unnoticed.   

As Doctor Phil, the television talking head would say, 

"So, how's that working out for you?"

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Q: How do you stop the bacon from curling in the pan? A: Take away their little brooms.

 

Q:  Why are curlers such good artists?
A:  Because they know how to draw!

Q:  What’s a curlers favorite kind of food?
A:  Take-out!

These are Curling jokes and I think you have to be into Curling to get the gags.

Getting carried away.

 

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 "There are 12 new events in this year's Winter Olympics, 12. 

The new events include 

women's ski jumping, luge-team relay, and finding a working toilet."

 –Conan O'Brien

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 "I guess it isn't going well over there. In fact, I heard there's even a shortage of pillows. The shortage is so bad that visitors are being asked to give their pillows to the Olympic athletes, because there's nothing more comforting than waking up in Russia to see a stranger coming at you with a pillow.

 'How was your sleep, Mr. Bond?'" 

–Jimmy Fallon

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 "Tomorrow night the Olympics begin from Sochi. A lot of people over there say the hotels stink. The problem is there are only three hotels in Sochi. Of course, you have the Ritz Chernobyl. You have the Sheraton Gulag. And really the best one over there, The Two Seasons."

 –David Letterman
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"The hotels are lousy. The Olympic village is a mess. The food is horrible. And, well, that's what happens when you tick off gay people." 

–David Letterman

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"This is the last night Jay Leno is hosting 'The Tonight Show.' Good luck, Jay. The lesson here is if you work hard and succeed, someday you will be fired."

 –Craig Ferguson

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What do you do with the poor people of Sochi?

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Every nation has it's poor people.  But what do you do with the homeless and poor when you are trying to put on a big shindig like the Winter Olympics....Simple you move them out of town.  There is no news coverage of this problem in Russia but it has to have happened.

News Headlines

              Russians say authorities rounding up,                                poisoning stray dogs before Olympics.

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Why Russians Aren't Smiling at You in Sochi.

  "In Russia only two types of people smile: idiots and rich people—and rich people don't walk on the street."

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      Sochi Locals Learn to Stop Worrying

               and Love the Olympics

In early December, trucks loaded with industrial trash began driving through the quiet village of Vesyoloe—”Happy” in Russian—and dumping their load on the hillside that overlooks Russia‘s main Olympic venues in the nearby city of Sochi. It was mostly junk left over from Olympic construction sites, and as the trucks kept coming, it began piling up around the property of Olga Fisko, who had moved from Moscow to Happy in 2010, just a few years after Sochi won the rights to host the Winter Games.
Fisko and her neighbors called the police every time the trucks arrived, but their promises to investigate went nowhere. Letters to the local government and to the Kremlin also had no effect. So in January, a few weeks before Games, Fisko’s small community decided to take drastic measures. They planned to burn the trash on the night of Feb. 7, just as President Vladimir Putin would be presiding over the opening ceremony of the Games. “That would show them,” Fisko told me at the time. “They’ll be lighting fireworks, and in the background they’ll have big, black plumes of smoke. Maybe then they would start to pay attention.”
Yet when the time came, the villagers couldn’t bring themselves to do it. “We watched the fireworks instead,” Fisko says the day after the opening ceremony. The trash was still laying around her hillside property in giant heaps, but the beauty of the spectacle below seemed to infect her with the Olympic spirit. The next day, Feb. 8, she and her family went for a walk around the stadium complex, where the Olympic torch had been lit the night before. “We gave up and just decided to enjoy it,” she says.
(MORE: Game On: U.S. Takes First Gold On Day 1 of Sochi Olympics)
And with that, a truce of sorts took hold in the long-running battle between the organizers of the Games and the local residents who have been impacted by Russia’s grand Olympic project. The truce wasn’t universal. In Moscow, a group of activists were arrested staging a protest during the opening ceremony against Russia’s controversial law banning “homosexual propaganda” among minors. But on the whole, the brilliance of the spectacle changed the tone even among the Games’ harshest critics.
The Western media, which had spent days harping on all the many oversights and imperfections of the Olympic preparations, joined in a chorus of praise for the undeniable beauty of the ceremony. That was the goal of the official who oversaw its design, Konstantin Ernst, who said on Friday that he wanted to present “the real Russians, untainted by decades of propaganda and the cold war.” It seems he pulled it off, as Russian officials from Putin to the Sochi city council had hoped.
Eleonora Evrandyan, the councilwoman who represents the village of Happy in the local legislature, says she had no doubt that the locals would get into the spirit eventually. “The Olympics always require self-sacrifice,” she says. “It’s like when a bunch of guests come over to your house for a party. You have to open up your heart and accept that your usual routine may be disrupted.”
When the Games are over, Evrandyan says, the local authorities will continue trying to deal with the complaints of residents that went unanswered in the final weeks and months leading up to the Games. “There are administrative mechanisms in place for this,” she insists.
Fisko isn’t so sure. When the Games leave town, she fears that Happy’s trash problem will continue to be ignored, especially as the attention of the global media will move on along with the Olympic torch. But for the next two weeks, she plans to ease up on her activism and attend some of the events. She and her husband already have their tickets in hand.

 

 

EYE IN THE SKY

                                            RED NECK EYE IN THE SKY