Tuesday, July 15, 2014

How to get rid of pesky neighbors..
















How to get rid of those pesky neighbors
 that won't leave you alone....
************************

Let the games begin...

1. Mow your lawn very early in the morning. Be sure and use the leaf blower as often as possible. Leave no stone unturned. No leaf visible to the naked eye.
2. Have a few pizza pies delivered to their address. When your neighbor refuses to pay because he didn't order them, tell the delivery driver that you'll buy them at a reduced rate instead of them going to waste.
3. Allow your pets to do their business in your neighbors yard and don't use a pooper scooper.
4. Ding dong ditch! Ring your neighbors doorbell and then hide. Once they go indoors, wait 10 minutes and then do it again. Then wait 20 minutes. Then 30 minutes. Then run like heck because chances are they will be waiting for you on the other side of the door.
5. TP their tree! Tell them it's out of courtesy so now they won't run out of toilet paper. Unless it rains.
6. Place rubber snakes around their garden beds. Have the video camera ready for when they leap. Post the video on YouTube.
7. When a solicitor knocks on your door to sell you something...rave about how much your neighbor is a fan of the product or organization. Tell them your neighbor is shy and might need some coaxing to admit it!
8. Late at night turn up the volume on your stereo and add some karaoke to the mix!
9. Paint your house a bright yellow. When confronted, go into a rant how about much you love sunshine and you want to be surrounded by the rays of the sun!
10. Keep your dog outdoors and allow it to bark 24/7. Be sure and give him/her food and water. You are intentionally trying to annoy your neighbors, but don't neglect your pet.

TP a tree!


11. Park your car in their parking spot. If they say something just break out into Britney Spears song of "Ooops, I did it again."
12. Set up a basketball hoop in your driveway and play b-ball at all hours of the day and night. Dribble the ball as often as you want!
13. Place a telescope near your window. Have it peeking through the curtains. Be sure your neighbor is aware of it. You are officially a "peeping tom."
14. Weed your yard in your swimsuit. Or birthday suit. Most people can't pull this off. There is a woman in my neighborhood who mows her lawn in heels and jeans in 90* temps. I'll never understand that.
15. Roast a pig in a backyard pit. Be sure the wind is blowing in the direction of your neighbors open windows. The more smoke the better.
16. Place a trail of sugar to your neighbors front porch! The ants will appreciate it, your neighbors won't.
17. Plant a Weeping Willow tree in your yard, but close to your neighbors property. Watch your neighbor weep as they try to escape the cascading willows!
18. Use their garden hose to fill your swimming pool and then have a pool party and invite them. Maybe.
19. If they have a sprinkler system, redirect their sprinkler heads to water your lawn!

Rubber snakes in the garden!

 
20. If you live in an apartment and the tenants above you have heavy feet, use your broom handle to bang on the ceiling. While they are sleeping.
21. Bake a plate of brownies and an extra ingredient that they should enjoy. Be sure your neighbor doesn't have a drug test coming up soon!!
22. Prune flowers from their garden and give your wife a bouquet. Who needs a florist?
23. Why pay for a wireless network? Just use your friendly neighbors unsecured Internet access!
24. Borrow their Sunday paper. Read it. Clip the coupons. Return their paper.
25. Be adults. Call a truce. Shake hands. Proceed to #1 and start again.

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